| August 2002 |
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Alternatives to Marriage Update:
In this issue:
Around the Alternatives to Marriage Project
Community Announcements
In the Media Fairness Message Reaches Hundreds of Media Outlets Last Month The Alternatives to Marriage Project had hundreds of television, radio, and print media appearances in the last month (see list below), as we were asked to provide insights on four different major reports and releases. What We Talked About: 1) A smart, provocative new article in the journal Family Process. In it, psychologist William Pinsof argues that since the average length of marriage has been about the same (15-20 years) for over 600 years, we should be realistic that lifelong marriage may not be the norm for all people. He advocates for increasing acceptance of divorce and cohabitation as part of "normal" family life. To read more quotes from his article, see our Experts Speak page. 2) Two new reports, one by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, and one by researcher and Marriage Movement supporter Scott Stanley, addressed cohabitation, marriage, and divorce. Many headlines drew the conclusion that the report found that cohabitation caused an increase in divorce risk, but many experts (including the authors of the CDC report) disagreed with that conclusion. AtMP responded to some of the misinformation at http://www.unmarried.org/cdc2002.html . 3) New data show that cohabitation is growing among senior citizens. Executive Director Dorian Solot was quoted in a national Associated Press article commenting, "There aren't many trends where grandparents are imitating their grandchildren, but cohabitation is one of them." This month's TV appearances: CNN Talkback Live, The O'Reilly Factor, MSNBC Dayside News This month's radio features: The Ollie North Show (national), the Gary Nolan show (national), Chris Moore Show (Pittsburgh), Fresh Fruit (Minneapolis/St. Paul), the Gill Gross Show (Los Angeles), the John Carlson show (Seattle), Let's Talk Long Island, the Sterling Show (Columbus), WDAO (Dayton), WGY (Albany), the WOR Morning Show (New York), and the Arnie Arnesen Show (New Hampshire and Minneapolis/St. Paul). This month's newspaper quotes: USA Today, three different national Associated Press articles that ran in newspapers around the country, the New York Post, and the Daily Universe (Brigham Young University). This month's online magazine quotes: Discovery Health, DivorceMagazine.com, HealthScout.com, and HipMama.com You can read some of these articles: Study: Divorce, Living Together Now Norms (USA Today) Census: More Elderly Live Together (Associated Press( Stats Show What Makes Marriages Work (Associated Press) Happily Unmarried (Discovery Health) Cohabitation Nation (DivorceMagazine.com) Around the Alternatives to Marriage Project 1) List AtMP in Your Commitment Ceremony or Wedding Registry Many partners who get married or celebrate their unmarried love with a ceremony are encouraging their guests to donate to the Alternatives to Marriage Project. It's a way to make your event contribute to the movement for fairness for all, regardless of marital status, sexual orientation, or family form. Including AtMP as a charity in your registry is easier than ever, because AtMP is listed with the online charity gift registries Felicite.com and JustGive.org (Felicite allows couples to register for both items from major stores and gifts to charities; JustGive lists only charities). Thanks for supporting AtMP's work while you celebrate your relationship! 2) AtMP Perspective Featured in Textbooks The brand new edition of the college text Taking Sides: Clashing Views on Controversial Issues in Human Sexuality (8th edition) includes the National Marriage Project's report on cohabitation, followed by our response: "Ten Problems (Plus One Bonus Problem) With The National Marriage Project's Cohabitation Report." The book is available through local and online booksellers. Instructors can order a complimentary copy: http://www.dushkin.com/text-data/catalog/0072480629.mhtml?SECTION=TOC . College students tell us AtMP is now listed as a resource in several textbooks, including Sociology: A Brief Introduction (4th ed.) by Richard Schaefer, and Human Sexuality: Meeting Your Basic Needs, by Christine Miracle, Andrew Miracle, and Roy Baumeister. If you see AtMP in yours, let us know! Our report, Let Them Eat Wedding Rings: The Role of Marriage Promotion in Welfare Reform will also be taught on campuses throughout the country this fall. Download your copy at http://www.unmarried.org/rings.php. 3) Fall Intern and Volunteer Positions Available We already miss our summer interns, Liesel Kuhr and Laurie Nelson, who kept things running smoothly in the office this summer and boosted AtMP's productivity. Starting now, AtMP has positions available for an intern or volunteer in our Providence/Boston-area office. The time commitment could range from a few hours to a few days per week. To discuss the possibilities, please contact us. To read about volunteer opportunities available from any location, go to our Support AtMP page, http://www.unmarried.org/getinvolved.html . 4) New Delivery Method for This Update This is the first issue of the Alternatives to Marriage Update sent over our new listserv, AtMP-Announce. You'll still get just one message a month, but the listserv makes it easier for us and you to manage your subscription. AtMP-Announce is an announcements-only list (unlike our other list, AtMP-Talk). Instructions for unsubscribing are at the end of this message. Community Announcements Group Offers Scholarships to Unmarried Moms The Raise the Nation Foundation is offering grants to single women to continue their educations or re-pay education loans. Solo single, cohabiting, and lesbian and bisexual unmarried parents are all eligible to apply. To learn more, see http://www.raisethenation.org. Raise the Nation is a project of Insanity House( http://www.insanityhouse.com ), a nonprofit organization advocating for single parents and non-traditional families. Book Buzz Just Living Together: Implications of Cohabitation on Families, Children, and Social Policy, edited by Alan Booth and Ann Crouter (2002) Reviewed by Dorian Solot Just Living Together is a collection of sixteen academic articles about cohabitation, originally presented at a symposium by the same name I attended in 2000. Though it probably isn't the kind of friendly, accessible read that would appeal to the average unmarried couple, it's a great new collection for students, academics, and others with an interest in understanding the demographic and sociological research on the subject. The anthology includes particularly fascinating articles by many of the world's leading experts on cohabitation. Kathleen Kiernan writes about cohabitation trends across Western Europe; Pamela Smock and Sanjiv Gupta providing an overview of the demographics of cohabitation in North America; Wendy Manning writes on children in cohabiting families; and Wendell Primus and Jennifer Beeson address policy issues that affect poor cohabiting families. I hope that the title of the book, Just Living Together, was meant ironically -- if not, it's a perfect example of the way unmarried relationships and families are considered less serious than other family forms. Either way, the articles within this collection definitely give cohabitation the serious consideration it deserves. (Note on ordering: while this book's list price is $59.95, it can be ordered prepaid from the publisher for $32.50. Contact This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it or 800-926-6579.) Sizzling Statistics Cohabitation Growing in Israel A survey shows that 26% of married Israelis lived with their spouses before marriage and 19% lived with another partner whom they did not marry. About 3.2% of the Jewish population in Israel currently live together without being married, growing at a steady rate of about one percent a year. Prof. Yohanan Peres of Tel Aviv University calls cohabitation the modern version of engagement. Cohabitation Growing Among Seniors U.S. Census data shows that the number of households containing an unmarried man and woman, at least one of whom is over age 65, grew 60% between 1990 and 2000, to 203,000 households. Of these, 112,000 couples said they were unmarried partners, but that is widely believed to be a significant undercount. Young Brits Can't Afford To Marry A new survey from Halifax, Britain found that one in seven twentysomethings said they could not afford to get married. Two thousand people were surveyed. News From the United States Thanks to Liesel Kuhr for compiling the news for this issue of the Update! Thanks, too, to Laurie Nelson and Sarah Blodgett for compiling last month's news (we inadvertantly forgot to thank them)! Bush: Proposed Bill Doesn't Push Marriage Enough After Senate Democrats unveiled their proposed bill welfare bill, President Bush expressed his unhappiness that it would allocate only one-third of the $300 million that he sought for programs that promote marriage. "That doesn't make sense to me," Bush said. "As a matter of fact, some of the money that they believe ought to be spent on so-called family building will go to programs that have nothing to do with promoting marriage." The House has already passed a bill which includes the $300 million allocation. Because there is no evidence that policies to "promote marriage" help reduce poverty, AtMP strongly opposes spending welfare dollars on these kinds of programs. To learn more, see our report, "Let Them Eat Wedding Rings: The Role of Marriage Promotion in Welfare Reform," at http://www.unmarried.org/rings.php.
New Law Makes Marriage Easier in Maine
Some Hotels Impose Marrieds-Only Requirement News From Around the World
Ontario Court Rules in Favor of Same-Sex Marriage Canadian Feds May Leave Marriage to Religious Groups The Canadian federal government, faced with a court ruling that would allow same-sex couples to get legally married, is considering withdrawing from the marriage business and leaving it to religious institutions. The prospect of abandoning regulation of marriage, however, is still in its infancy and many issues have yet to be examined, including the impact it would have on divorce. If you're interested in the idea of abolishing marriage as a legal category, check out the book The Neutered Mother, The Sexual Family, and Other Twentieth Century Tragedies, by legal theorist Martha Fineman. In it, she argues that this approach to family law would be more fair. Canada Gets First Gay Civil Union In Canada, two gay men made history by becoming the first same-sex couple to be joined in a civil union, taking advantage of a new provincial law in Quebec that allows "common-law" unions of same-sex couples. Unlike in the U.S., Canadian unmarried couples receive broad rights in "common law unions" similar to those received by married couples. Now, same-sex couples are also eligible to form common law unions.
Nigerian Court Considers Stoning Death Appeal
Australia Considers Overhaul of Divorce Laws
Taiwan May Require Couples to Register Marriages Domestic Partner News (U.S.)
Bill Would Extend DP Benefits to Federal Employees Indianapolis Decides Against DP Benefits The city of Indianapolis recently decided not to provide health care benefits to the domestic partners of city workers. Critics said the plan would undermine the institution of marriage, and the Republican members of the Rules and Public Policy Committee used their majority position to kill the measure. In nearby Bloomington, where a domestic partners health care benefit has been in place for more than six years, city officials said Indianapolis was making a mistake. California Considers DP Benefit Requirement Companies that do not provide domestic partner benefits would be prohibited from doing business with the state under legislation moving through the California Senate. It would make the state the first to mandate that private sector contractors provide partner benefits. Five California local governments, including San Francisco and Los Angeles, already use a similar policy. Quoteworthy "Cohabitation without children or marriage needs to be viewed not only as a legitimate end-state in itself, but also as a legitimate form of pre-marriage." - William Pinsof, family psychologist and President of the Family Institute at Northwestern University, in Family Process, vol 41. 2., 2002 |
