In 2003, my partner Jay and I were committed. We called the ceremony a "commitzvah" - a term we borrowed from our pals Priscilla Yamin and Joe Lowndes. Priscilla is a former board member who introduced me to AtMP. I was thrilled and relieved to discover that I was not alone in my attitudes toward marriage - a sentiment I know I share with many of you. I'd like to see governments get out of the marriage business entirely and let people define intimate relations for themselves with ceremonies and/or private contracts.

Until this past year, I worked at Human Rights Watch where I'd been for seven years; before that I was at Madre, a women's human rights group. I went back to grad school a few years ago and am currently working on my dissertation on masculinity and feminism. I'm also putting together a collection of contemporary writers and their thoughts about the state of fatherhood.

Jay and I live in New York City's East Village with our cat, Maggie Pie.